I used to always get the advice, “don’t go backwards, keep moving forward.” And to me this used to translate to mean no second chances. I used to be very discouraged by this advice. One part of me would nod in acknowledgement of the validity of the statement, but another part of me would doubt it, internally processing the person who was giving the advice as unforgiving.
God worked on my heart, however and during my journey one day He gave me a revelation.
I was often given the advice as a woman that the man who would become my husband should be on my level or ahead of me. I also was told that we cannot change a man’s heart, that only God can. And if we were meant to be, God would change his heart. God, the agent of change, can change people, but it has to come from Him. It is not up to me to go backward and reach out for that ex, due to my own impatience or temptations.
My focus had to stop being on the past and had to start being on the future. I would maintain a forward gaze, letting go of what was behind me (including the ex) and keep moving forward to what was ahead of me. And I would not stop my journey or turn around for any man. The best relationship advice I ever got to finding a Godly husband was running to Jesus as fast as I can! The closer to Him, the closer to each other.
I imagine myself in a race towards God and that my future husband would either be running beside me or ahead of me. It was during this visualization that I realized if God has plans for you to truly be with that ex, He will change their heart.
And one day as you run along in your journey towards God and that same person is brought back beside you, you will realize then that you did not go backward, you brought them forward!
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